were–ralph:

were–ralph:

were–ralph:

Mitch McConnell will die two weeks from today (8/31/23)

today is the day lads

cast NOW do NOT hold back cast NOW

killyfromblame:

WE DID NOT CALLS YOU A SLUR. SMÉAGOL CAN RECLAIMS IT

beingharsh:

“John Waters Is Ready for His Hollywood Closeup”, The New Yorker

solisaureus:

solisaureus:

came home drunk last night and got way too excited to see my cat

everyone look at these namaki drawings that my friend @lakefama drew i’m crying

medusasstory:

sexysilverstrider:

the group chat when i ask whos available to hang out next week

Honestly this is one of the best formatted jokes of all time.

sadclowncentral:

sadclowncentral:

weird how no one ever comments on the absence of smells unprompted. the nose just isn’t a topic of conversation unless it’s urgent huh

“it’s dark in here” normal regular observation

“finally some quiet” relatable exclamation

“doesn’t smell like anything in here” absolutely deranged sentence

yeehawpim:

a comic about different types of storytellers

bulletsgirl:

yournewfriendshouse:

c-53:

Another fun thing I do with customers - specifically parents of very small children who don’t know they’re alive yet - is directly imply I think the coffee is for the baby, not the parent. and lemme tell you, like 70% of parents eat that shit up. They immediately go along with the bit and start discussing it with their newborn child, while the baby just stares at us like 😮

ALT

dostoyevsky-official: